A Beautiful World

Welcome to my new blog “A Beautiful world”. Some of you may have known me as the person who writes about their Kundlalini process, the former blog being called “A Life Divine”. So if you are finding me once more, then welcome back. If you are new, welcome to my beautiful world.
Even though most people think that with the global pandemic all has been plunged into chaos it is not so. I found that the world keeps on turning with or without us. More than ever before, I can see that people are becoming more aware of their surroundings and of their lifestyle choices. Certainly not everyone as we are currently counting a population of 7.9 billion people, but some have come to the realization that a 9-5 job is not what they would like their life to be like. More than ever people are changing their careers, asking themselves whether the life that is being publicly promoted as “normal” is really worth it. It is an increasingly large number of people who step out of this model of having to do the grind.
Mother Earth has raised her frequency and demands greater care, more people are trying to make an effort and I can see it in some small gestures and comments from people at work. Some inhabitants of this wonderful planet have taken the global pandemic in order to heal, to rest, to become creative once more, whereas a lot of others have panicked and gone into hiding. It depends on the character of a person.

Personally I decided to look into loving myself more, to become more at ease with who I thought I was and who I really am at the core. It had been an ongoing work for many years and now had come to a culmination. At the end I discovered that I had taken on many forms of likes and dislikes, identities from other people that did not match my own set-up. Through a rough upbringing (back in the days a kid still got a beating), being a sensitive, which I only understood over the past couple of years, and being part of generation X, an in-betweener, the boom of consumerism and abundant material goods, it all played a large part on my psyche. I did not understand that we all hold light and dark within ourselves and that is is up to us to choose in between the two. Most people spend their lifetime being swayed from one thing to another like children. In fact, their psyche never grows up. And so they never get to know themselves and just repeat what others are promoting, when in fact NO ONE HAS A CLUE.
I figured this out as I had been teaching meditation for a few years and discovered that most people were not willing to go all the way to discover who they really were. Because after all: If the next Messiah showed up, who on this planet would have time, enough faith, and enough courage and strength to follow her/him? It would be a battle for dogma, religious strain, cultural dichotomy, etc. It would never work, because each person would superimpose their belief system onto that person. And who on this planet would be able to follow that new Messiah? No one really, or only those who have lost everything.It would be a struggle for being liked by others once more and identifying with this person that has showed up. Rather I would like to believe that this sort of work is done by many. Apparently there exist only 47 enlightened Masters at the same time on this planet. Too few if one thinks about the large amount of population that inhabits earth. But only those have a clue. People utterly dislike the truth I have come to learn. They enjoy being miserable, because it means comfort. It is what they know. I had been told by many that they do not wish to awaken. Straight in my face. It was shocking at times that people do not want to do that. For it would mean true freedom in a world that holds a lot of beauty, yet, is also reigned by chaos. But it is the potential that one has to come to see, to accept what is happening now, but to choose change. So really, when you find an expert in something, they most likely have no clue. I don’t even think that I have a clue. What I have experienced so far, is but a small part of the whole truth. It is impossible to experience all of it as long as we are in a human body.

I taught people how to look for themselves again, forgetting myself in the process. I had built yet another identity, much weaker than in my life before, but at a certain point I realized that I also had to give this up. Then, left with no form of identity, the ego clings to the last bits and bobs that it has known in this lifetime, it clings even to religious schemes, or anything paranormal, but at the end even this I had to give up.
You may wonder what is left then?
Everything is left: Because you are so filled with God consciousness, you realize that everything around you is also beautiful: The pople, the houses, the evening sky, literally everything. Unfortunately, one also realizes that there is a lot of rubbish in oneself as well as others and often it comes with great disappointment. But even that one learns to give up and what remains is just bits and bobs of truth, which is ever-expanding and ever-changing. It is a complete loss of identity. In Sufism it is called nothingness, the opening of the heart, the Yogis call it shunya, the void. Out of this void one can be filled.


Currently I am trying to going back to the “real world” where one earns money in a normal job and i am finding that I can enjoy almost everything, but that I know that this is not it. The search for the self has ended and now I am looking for true happiness, for the fulfillment in life that I have been searching for. I am also realizing that just doing a job because of money reasons still is not me.

So instead, I am starting to look for continuous happiness. If I am able to find that inside of me, no matter what, then that is the freedom everyone should be seeking, because we all have ups and downs. Life goes in mysterious ways and we can never control these things. We need to accept a certain factor of unease and not knowing what comes next. We have to build up the courage to say: I do not know. In the eyes of the world it may often seem as one being a looser, but it is the work of those who wish to be happy. We all have our fears and our anger that is stored up somewhere. We are being continuously triggered by outward circumstances, be people, by situations, by our surroundings and news. But it is up to us to decide whether we would like to become more of a witness or being swayed continuously by outward circumstances.

Instead of talking about all the negative things in this world, I would like to bring you beauty, joy, and hopefully love, and parts of the truth that is to be found everywhere that we look at.


Most people miss out on it, because they are so busy with themselves and tuning out all that is happening that they miss the beauty of life.
But let me tell you that it is to be found everywhere you look. The key is to look for love first before you can find beauty. Otherwise it is a lost cause.

Just remember that you are never alone and that you will only find harmony when you decide to live a balanced life in all layers of your psyche, your body, your emotions, and your mind.

Welcome to the discovery of beauty.

Vanessa

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